Chapter One
Lesson 12
Confess
Principle 4: Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God,
and to someone I trust.
"Happy are the pure in heart."
Step 5: We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human
being the exact nature of our wrongs.
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each
other so that you may be healed."
James 5:16
Think About It
After writing an inventory, we must deal with what we have written.
The first way we do that is to confess our sins to God. Lets review
the acrostic for CONFESS.
Confess your shortcomings, resentments, and sins
God wants us to come clean. We need to admit that "what is wrong
is wrong. We're guilty as charged." We need to own up to the sins we
discovered in our inventory.
"He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses
and renounces them finds mercy" (Proverbs 28:13).
Obey God's directions
Principle 4 sums up God's directions for confessing our sins.
1. We confess our sins to God.
"'As surely as I am the living God, says the Lord, everyone will
kneel before me, and everyone will confess that I am God.' Every one
of us, then, will have to give an account of himself to God" (Romans
14:11-12 GNB).
2. We share them with another person whom we trust:
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other
so that you may be healed" (James 5:16).
No more guilt
This step begins to restore our confidence and our relationships
and allows us to move on from our "rearview mirror" living. In Romans
8:1 we are assured that "there is now no condemnation for those who
are in Christ Jesus."
"All of have sinned; . yet now God declares us 'not guilty' . if
we trust in Jesus Christ, who . freely takes away our sins" (Romans
3:23-24 TLB).
The "CON" is over! We have followed God's directions on how to
confess our wrongs. Four very positive things start to happen after we
"FESS" up.
Face the truth
Recovery requires honesty! After we complete this principle we can
allow the light of God's truth to heal our hurts, hang-ups, and habits.
We stop denying our true feelings.
"Jesus . said, 'I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will
never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life'" (John 8:12).
"Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free"
(John 8:32).
Ease the pain
"We are only as sick as our secrets!" When we share our deepest
secrets we divide the pain and the shame. We begin to see a healthy self-worth
develop, one that is no longer based on the world's standards, but
on those of Jesus Christ.
"There was a time when I wouldn't admit what a sinner I was. But
my dishonesty made me miserable and filled my days with frustration
My strength evaporated like water on a sunny day until I finally
admitted all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide them. I said to
myself, 'I will confess them to the Lord.' And you forgave me! All my
guilt is gone" (Psalm 32:3-5 TLB).
Stop the blame
We cannot find peace and serenity if we continue to blame ourselves
or others. Our secrets have isolated us from each other. They have
prevented intimacy in all our relationships.
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and
fail to notice the plank in your own? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me get the speck out of your eye,' when there is a plank in your
own? . Take the plank out of your own eye first, and then you can
see clearly enough to remove your brother's speck of dust" (Matthew 7:3
Phillips).
Start accepting God's forgiveness
Once we accept God's forgiveness we can look others in the eye.
We understand ourselves and our past actions in a "new light." We
are ready to find the humility to exchange our shortcomings in Principle
5.
"For God was in Christ, restoring the world to himself, no longer
counting men's sins against them but blotting them out" (2 Corinthians
5:19 TLB).
"But if we confess our sins, he will forgive our sins, because we can
trust God to do what is right. He will cleanse us from all the wrongs
we have done" (1 John 1:9 NCV).
Write About It
1. What wrongs, resentments, or secret sins are keeping you awake
at night? Wouldn't you like to get rid of them?
2. What value do you see in confessing, in coming clean of the
wreckage of your past?
3. As you obey God's directions for confession, what results do you
expect God to produce in your life?
4. What freedom do you feel from the verses in Romans 8:1 and
Romans 3:23-24? What specifically do the phrases "no
condemnation" and "not guilty" mean to you?
5. After you complete Principle 4, you will find four areas of your
life begin to improve. You will be able to face the truth, ease the
pain, stop the blame, and start accepting God's forgiveness. In
what areas of your life will each of these four positive changes
help your recovery?
I can be more honest with .
I can ease my pain by .
I can stop blaming .
I can accept God's forgiveness because of .
Lesson 13
Admit
Principle 4: Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God,
and to someone I trust.
"Happy are the pure in heart."
Step 5: We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human
being the exact nature of our wrongs.
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each
other so that you may be healed."
James 5:16
Think About It
People often ask me why they need to admit their wrongs to
another person. There are three main reasons.
Why admit my wrongs?
1. We gain healing that the Bible promises.
Look at James 5:16 again. God's Word tells us that we are to admit
our wrongs, our sins, to one another. You do this not to receive their
forgiveness, for God already forgave you when you confessed your
wrongs and sins to Him. James 5:16 says to confess your sins to one
another for healing.
Sharing our secrets, struggles, and failures with another is part
of God's plan of our healing process. The road to recovery is not meant
to be walked alone.
2. We gain freedom.
Our secrets have kept us in chains, bound up, frozen, and unable
to move in all our relationships. Admitting our sins snaps the chains.
"They cried to the Lord in their troubles, and he rescued them! He led them from the darkness and the shadow of death and snapped
their chains" (Psalm 107:13-14 TLB).
3. We gain support.
When you share your inventory with another person, you get support.
The person can keep you focused and provide feedback. He or she
can challenge you when denial surfaces. Most important, the person will
listen!
How do I choose someone?
1. Choose someone of the same sex as you whom you trust and
respect.
2. Ask the person if he or she has completed Principle 4 (or Steps
4 and 5).
3. Set up an appointment with the person, a time without interruptions!
It usually takes two to three hours to share your inventory.
Guidelines for your meeting
1. Start with prayer. Ask for courage, humility, and honesty. Here
is a sample prayer:
God, I ask that You fill me with Your peace and strength during
my sharing of my inventory. I know that You have forgiven me
for my past wrongs, my sins. Thank You for sending Your Son to
pay the price for me, so my sins can be forgiven. During this meeting
help me to be humble and completely honest. Thank You for
providing me with this program and _______ (the
name of the person with whom you are sharing your inventory).
Thank You for allowing the chains of my past to be snapped. In
my Savior's name I pray, AMEN.
2. Read the Principle 4 verses found on page 22 in this participant's
guide.
3. Keep your sharing balanced-weaknesses and strengths!
4. End in prayer. Thank God for the tools He has given to you and
for the complete forgiveness found in Christ!
"But if we confess our sins, he will forgive our sins, because we can
trust God to do what is right. He will cleanse us from all the wrongs
we have done" (1 John 1:9 NCV).
Write About It
1. In Principle 4 we are asked to give our inventory three times.
Who are we to confess it to and why?
2. Most of us find it easier to confess our wrongs to ourselves and
God. We seem to have more difficulty in sharing them with
another person. What is the most difficult part for you? Why?
(Continues.)
