Chapter One
Section
OneQuestions About Family
Q. My dad was recently diagnosed with cancer.
Sometimes he's in a lot of pain. He works a
lot, and when he is home, it seems as if he
and my mom are always going on walks
together. I need him, too!
A. I'm so sorry your dad is fighting the tough battle
of cancer. He's probably frightened and wondering how
much time he has left. That must be scary for you as
well.
If his days are numbered, he may be spending more
time with your mom to ensure that everything's taken
care of. For example, they may be talking about insurance,
savings, the money for your future college years,
etc. He probably wants to make sure your family will
be well provided for after he's gone. And they may feel
it's inappropriate, or too disturbing, to include you and
your brothers or sisters in these conversations.
And though it seems he's spending extra time with
your mom, he may not even realize that the two of you
haven't had much time together recently. Why not bake
his favorite dessert? Or rent one of his all-time fave
videos, make some popcorn, and curl up on the couch
with him.
Ask if the two of you can have a dad-daughter date,
and tell him how much you love him. Meanwhile, since
you know he's in physical pain, pray for him and be
patient with him.
Q. Every person in my family is or was addicted
to something. Can that be passed down in the
genes?
A. Yes and no. Let's take it slow and simple, okay?
There is such a thing as having a predisposition to
addiction. That means you may have tendencies toward
addiction. But if you know that, you can certainly learn
to make wise choices to stay away from addictive things.
We all have free choice. Your family may be predisposed
toward addictive behavior, but that doesn't mean
there's no hope. You don't have to become addicted.
God doesn't want anyone to be addicted to anything.
Have you asked him for help? Why don't we pray
about it right now, okay?
Dear Jesus:
It makes me sad that everyone in my family
is, or has been, addicted to something. I
don't want to become an addict. Will you
take control of my life? I want to give
myself totally to you, Jesus. Please help me
to stay completely away from anything that
could become addictive such as cigarettes,
alcohol, drugs, pornography, and (fill in the
blank with anything else you can think of).
Guide me, Father. Teach me how to make
wise choices. I love you, and I'll trust you
with my life. Amen.
Q. My seven-year-old brother loves to get me in
trouble. I don't know what to do to make him
stop. I've told my parents, but they don't do
anything about it. How can I make him stop?
A. This may not be the answer you're wanting, but
here goes. You probably can't make him stop. None of
us can control other people's behavior. But here's the
good news: This is an important lesson for you to
learn. Why? Because we go through our entire lives
having to deal with people who don't behave right, and
the sooner we learn to handle it, the better.
Even though he's saying stuff to get you in trouble,
promise God that you'll always be honest. People often
get accused of something that wasn't their fault, and
there's no defense. It's not fair, but it happens. God
knows your heart, and he can help you endure the consequences
of your brother's behavior-even though
you're not to blame. Jesus was crucified on a cross,
and he was completely innocent. He has the power to
help you in similar situations.
There will probably be others in your life who will
blame you for something you didn't do, or tell lies
about you. Keep being honest. Eventually, those
around you will see you as a young lady of integrity
and great character. And the dishonesty in others will
be seen as well.
One more thing: Even though you may get in trouble
when you don't deserve it . you can still feel really
good about yourself by knowing you're an honest girl.
Always tell the truth.
(Continues.)
