Chapter One
Who's Number One?
I am the Lord your God . You shall
have no other gods before me.Exodus 20:2-3
Is it just me, or did Moses make it sound really easy when he came down from
Mt. Sinai with the Ten Commandments and said, "This is what we have to do
to obey God"? How tough is it not to make idols, steal, kill, cheat, swear, and
lie about people? To hear him tell it, being obedient is a piece of cake.
But if you live past the age of about two, you figure out that it's harder
than it sounds! The Girlz certainly have realized it.
Lily wouldn't dream of committing murder. But when Shad Shifferdecker
announces in the cafeteria-in a voice loud enough for the whole world to
hear-that Lily is pigeon-toed, Lily wouldn't mind too much if Shad were
suddenly stricken with "terminal" appendicitis. Yet isn't wishing somebody
would drop dead about as bad as holding a gun on them?
Reni knows that cheating is wrong. But during a science test when she sees
one of her friends glancing at someone else's paper before writing down an
answer, she has a tough decision to make. Can not reporting someone else for
cheating be anywhere near as bad as, say, copying someone else's term paper?
You don't have to tell Zooey it's wrong to say something about somebody
that isn't true. Still, when Chelsea and Ashley-the two most popular girls
in the whole class-are discussing Marcie McCleary with her, what's so
terrible about saying something not-so-nice about Marcie (provided that it's true,
of course)? After all, it isn't every day that Chelsea and Ashley even look at
Zooey, much less talk to her.
When you get right down to it, following the Ten Commandments-God's
guides for right living-isn't that easy. Just like Lily and her friends,
you're bound to face plenty of situations where the
rules aren't spelled out all that clearly.
What do you do then?
What if your life is so crowded you
don't have time to pray and read
your Bible-but you keep
hearing that you're supposed to
put God before everything else?
What if all-and I mean all-your friends are getting their noses pierced,
and you're going to feel like a complete loser if you don't do it too-but
you're pretty sure you've heard in church that it's God you're supposed to be
worshiping?
What if keeping the Sabbath day holy means sitting through a
really boring Sunday school class and an even worse
worship service?
What if those parents you're supposed to be
honoring do stuff that's so unfair?
What if your friend's wardrobe, that you're not
supposed to covet, is calling your name? What if-
You get the idea. When it gets down to the nitty-gritty, those
kinds of decisions can be difficult, and rules like "Thou shalt not kill" don't
really seem to apply. But not to worry-God has it all covered, and this book
is in your hands to help you figure out how. There isn't a situation you could
possibly face that the Father doesn't have a solution for. It may not be as easy
as Moses made it sound, but it isn't impossible. The bugaboos of life can be
conquered!
HOW IS THIS A GOD THING?
You aren't the first one to ask "What if?" Back when Jesus was here on
earth, people asked him questions like that all the time.
"What if I divorce my wife, only I do it legally? Isn't that okay?"
"What if somebody hits me first? Don't I have the right to hit them back?"
"What if some out-of-it person wants to hang out with me? Isn't that bad
for my reputation?"
"What if I've given all my money to the church? Do I still have to take care
of my parents in their old age?"
"What if my brother or sister hurts me? How many times do I have to
forgive?"
"What if I'm really rich-do I have to give up everything to follow you?"
"What if I promise something, only I have my fingers crossed? Does it still
count? Isn't a promise only a promise if I have my hand on the Bible?"
Never once did Jesus say, "Gosh, I don't know. Let me get back to you on
that." He always had guidelines to share, and they all boiled down to basically
two things:
Does what you want to do show that you love God with all your heart,
body, and mind (which pretty much covers everything!)? (Matthew 22:37)
AND
Does what you want to do show that you love your neighbor the way you
do yourself? (Matthew 22:39)
As we look at some of the not-so-easy decisions you have to make, we'll
come back to those two guidelines from Jesus again and again and show
exactly how they work.
They're what we call a frame of reference. It's sort of like when you get
separated from your mom or your friends at the mall and you start to feel a little
lost and uneasy. If you can spot that huge piece of art in the center of the mall,
you can always figure out where you are "in reference" to that. It's like a land-
mark that guides you. Jesus' two greatest commandments are like landmarks too.
Think of the Ten Commandments as the mall itself. If you want to get
around in there and find what you need, you constantly have to look back at
what Jesus says about loving God and loving your neighbor as yourself. Those
two principles serve as a frame of reference for your life just like the huge
piece of art serves as a frame of reference for the mall.
So let's start with the first of God's rules that Moses brought down from
the mountain:
I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt,
out of the land of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me.
Exodus 20:2-3
Simple enough, right? No pushing God out of the way for any of those
ridiculous-looking idols.
Let's find out-
[CHECK] Check Yourself Out
If you're ready to be really honest with yourself, find a spot where you can
be all alone for a few minutes, where nobody is going to be looking over your
shoulder. Then, number the items on the list below in order of how important
they are to you. Number one will be the most important, number two the
second most important, and so on.
If you have trouble deciding, ask yourself this question: which one of these
things would I have the most trouble giving up? That would be number one.
The one you'd have almost as much trouble letting go of would be number
two. Be sure to think about the consequences of giving up certain things, as
well as how you feel about those activities! Okay, here we go:
____ the time I spend with my parents
____ the time I spend hanging out with my friends
____ the time I spend doing things I enjoy by myself
____ the time I spend with God
____ the time I spend taking lessons or doing sports
____ the time I spend with my brothers and sisters
____ the time I spend doing homework and studying
____ the time I spend doing chores
What you've just done is prioritize
the activities in your life.
That means you've decided the
order of their importance to you.
If you marked "the time I spend
hanging out with my friends"
number one, that
means being with them, doing stuff like watching movies and consuming large
quantities of microwave popcorn, is the most important thing in your life. If
you marked "the time I spend doing chores" number one, that means the most
important thing in your life is doing chores. (It could also mean that you need
a brain transplant!)
So what's the right answer?
Let's get back to our frame of reference. If you go by our first
commandment (love God with all your heart, body, and mind), then your number one
choice should be "the time I spend with God."
I can see you now, grabbing your eraser to fix that on your quiz and saying,
"I knew that-I did! I meant to make that number one!" But don't feel bad.
It's really difficult in today's busy world to put the right things first. You aren't
the only one.
GIRLZ want to know
* LILY: By the time I go to school all day, then have a Girlz Only Club
meeting, then go home and set the table, have dinner, help with the dishes,
do my homework, talk to some of my friends on the phone, take a bath,
brush my teeth, write in my journal, and fight with my little brother, I have
about five minutes left to pray before I fall asleep!
* RENI: I'm in the school orchestra, and I'm taking private violin
lessons. My parents say I have a gift from God for music and they're proud of
me for using it. Isn't that putting God first?
* ZOOEY: Yikes! My mom doesn't even take me to church. I didn't know
you were supposed to spend time with God. How do you do that anyway?
* KRESHA: If I try to have quiet time with God, my brothers are going to
make fun of me-I know it. I'll have to hide in the closet or something! Is
that really what God wants?
* SUZY: I thought God was just with me all the time. How can I spend
more time with him than that?
If you have questions like these, you may need to find some new ways to
organize the time you don't spend in school, sleeping, or doing other necessary
things so that you can have some special time just for God. As we go along,
you'll learn more about what to do with that time once you've found it.
Just Do It
Time never stops. It never slows down, and it never speeds up. Everybody,
from the president of the United States to your baby brother, gets the same
number of seconds, minutes, and hours every day, and everyone gets the same
number of days, weeks, and months in every year. If anybody can find a way
to get it all in, including quiet time with God, everybody can. Let's take a look
at how.
Start by filling in this chart with your activities for the last couple of days.
Write a few words about how you spent each period of time. For instance,
from midnight to 6:00 a.m. on the first day, you were probably sleeping, so
write "sleeping" in each box for that time period. Maybe from 6:00 to 9:00
p.m. last night you were watching television, so write "watching television" in
each box for that time period.
Now fill out the next chart. List in the column headed "Activity" each thing
you did during the last three days, such as sleeping, doing homework,
watching television, playing computer games, or doing chores.
Under "Total Hours Spent Each Day," add up how much
time you spent doing each activity each of the three days.
Then add up the total hours you spent on each activity the
whole three days and fill in the total in the last column.
Okay, now ask yourself these questions:
What did I spend the most time doing BESIDES sleeping and going to
school?
What did I spend the least time doing?
What would I like to have spent more time doing?
What would I like to have spent less time doing (besides sleeping and going
to school!)?
What would I like to have done but didn't do at all?
Did I have enough free time when I could do whatever I wanted?
Did I get to decide when I wanted to do things at least some of the time?
Do I like the way I spent the time I had control over (the time when I wasn't
asleep or at school)?
Believe it or not, you really do have the power to plan what you do with
some of your time, and it can actually be fun. If this sounds like your kind of
fun, you'll need:
a large sheet of poster paper.
a calendar with spaces big enough to write in for each day.
a pencil with an eraser.
a pad of paper.
Before you start, remember these things:
First, you don't have to make plans for everything you do
every day, because you do some things automatically, like
getting dressed, eating, going to school, taking a bath,
and sleeping. You should allow time for those
things, but you don't have to make special plans to
do them.
Second, even though you're young-like maybe not
even in middle school yet-you can still make some plans for the whole year
ahead. That may sound kind of scary, but actually it's exciting!
Step 1
Look at the answers to the questions under "Check Yourself Out." Use
them to help you decide these things: What do I want to do this year?
Do I want to obtain something? Become something? Learn something?
Make something? Go someplace? Get to know someone? If you really want
to make spending time with God the most important thing in your life, this is
the place to include that: I want to get into the habit of spending special time
with God every day.
Step 2
Write down the answers to those questions in Step 1 in the form of a
list on your pad of paper. These examples may help you:
Lily's List
Find a way to spend quiet time with God every day
Write for the school newspaper
Make straight A's
Learn how to French braid my hair
Learn how to speak French
Take Otto to obedience school
Reni's List
Buy a violin of my own instead of renting one
Be able to play "The Flight of the Bumble Bee"
Go to orchestra camp
Make citywide middle-school orchestra
Meet a professional violinist
Spend quiet time with God
Zooey's List
Lose fifty pounds
Make good grades so I can be in honors classes in eighth grade
Redecorate my bedroom
Go away to summer camp
Join a church
Kresha's List
Learn to speak English really well
Get a new hairstyle
Try out for the soccer team
Try out for the softball team
Try out for the cheerleading squad
Find a husband for my mom
Have that quiet time thing with God
Suzy's List
Stop being so shy
Get along better with my sister
Read the whole Bible
Go to a better soccer camp next summer
Learn to do a double back flip
Step 3
Cross out the things that are impossible-just ain't gonna
happen-or that really aren't that important to you after all. Get rid
of the things that, on second thought, you don't really want to do
or won't be able to do. You can also change things a little instead of
crossing them out.
Lily realized she wouldn't be able to learn to speak fluent French in a
year, so she changed her goal to taking a French class. She also remembered
that her hair is pretty wild and thick and decided that trying to learn to French
braid it might be a lost cause. She crossed that out.
Reni remembered that she's just a beginner and "The Flight
of the Bumble Bee" is for advanced students, so she crossed that
out. And since chances are she won't get to meet a professional
violinist, she crossed that out too. Then she took getting her own
violin off the list, because her parents are going to send her to orchestra
camp. She realized they probably couldn't afford both.
Zooey decided that fifty pounds might be a little ambitious, so she changed
her goal to ten pounds. She felt that was plenty to get started. Then she
decided to work hard to make the best grades she can and not worry about
whether that puts her in honors classes.
(Continues.)
