Chapter One
Zooey sometimes feels like school is a complete waste of time. She's in what
she calls the "dumb classes," and even
those are hard for her, so she feels like
an idiot for six hours every day. As if that weren't bad enough, she usually has
what feels like ten tons of homework, so she gets to feel idiotic at
home too!
Zooey's solution? Pretend you don't care what grades you make. Blow off your
teachers. And forget even trying to do schoolwork at home.
Suzy is really gifted at sports. She can kick tail in gymnastics, soccer, softball,
and volleyball, and she hopes she gets a growth spurt soon so she can compete
in girls' basketball too. Quiet and considerate as she is, Suzy hates to lose in
any sports competition, and she'll do just about anything to win. When it looks
like doing her best isn't going to be enough, she isn't willing to give up. Suzy's
solution? Get away with as much stretching of the rules and dirty playing as you
can, intimidate your opponents, and if you lose, sulk for days and blame it on
everybody else, including your own teammates.
Reni is a natural leader, and nowhere is that more evident than in orchestra.
After all, she is first chair violin and an All-State representative. Other kids in
the orchestra tend to look up to her and see her as their spokesperson, and most
of the time, Reni rises to the occasion. Sometimes, however, she rises just a
little too high, becoming critical, snapping at people when they're doing stuff
she considers "lame" and getting jealous when someone else tries to rise. Reni's
solution? Remind other people just how superior she is and just how lucky they
are to have her in charge. When that doesn't work, she gathers the supporters
she does have and declares war.
Lily is a doer, and she goes at everything she does 100 percent and then
some. She writes for the school newspaper. She's the heart and soul of the
Shakespeare Club. She's the seventh grade class president. She goes out for
public speaking. And that's just what she does at school. On the "outside," she
does the occasional modeling gig, throws great parties, rides horses, and is
involved in the junior high youth group at church. Her life is full-sometimes
too full. At times she dives into things before she really knows what's in store.
And sometimes she just doesn't get why the other people in these groups aren't
as gung-ho as she is. Lily's solution? Try to do it all-by yourself if you have
to-until you drop-or burn out-or just get so disappointed that you quit.
Kresha hangs out with the Girlz, who are a pretty spiritual group. They
pray together, often go to church as a group, and for the most part try to figure
out what God wants them to do in their lives. Kresha likes everything the Girlz
do together, so she goes along with the God thing too. But most of the time,
when she's alone, Kresha kind of figures she's got plenty of time to really be a
disciple of God's son. She's young now-isn't this the time to have fun and
explore her options? When anybody questions her about where she is with God,
Kresha's solution is to tell them that her relationship with God is very private-and
then go on about her business. But the reality is, she doesn't even have a
relationship with God.
Each of our Girlz has a conflict, a tough situation, or a dilemma in some
area of her life. Zooey struggles with school. Suzy has issues with sportsmanship.
Reni is challenged when it comes to being a leader. Lily gets tangled
up in the whole extracurricular activity thing. And Kresha isn't even
aware that she's missing out in her relationship with God.
Even though each girl appears to be floundering in a different place, they
all have one thing in common. They all need to develop integrity.
You may already know what integrity is or you may have heard it enough
that you think it has something to do with what lawyers and doctors and
judges are supposed to have. They definitely should have it-and so
should everyone else on the face of the earth!
Integrity is a quality-just as honesty, generosity, and
compassion are qualities-that every person needs to
develop if she's going to be the best she can be at everything
she does. Not the best in terms of ability-like Suzy-or natural
flair-like Reni-or determination-like Lily. We're talking
about being the best person you can be. If you have integrity,
you can be the best you whether you win or lose, fail or
succeed, excel or do your best and still barely scrape by.
"Yikes!" you may be saying. "I gotta get me some
of that!"
Yes, you do-so let's find out how. We'll start
with just exactly what integrity is.
The word itself really means being of sound moral
principle, being upright, honest, and sincere. But it
comes from a word that means complete, whole, and
not easily broken apart.
In case that doesn't exactly
clear things up, it might
help to see the difference
between what it looks
like when integrity is
missing and when it's a
part of you.
NO INTEGRITY
Cop an attitude in class when you
don't understand the material.
Take the opportunity to step on
the girl on the other team when
she trips and falls on the field.
When two of your clubs have
meetings at the same time,
leave one early and be late to
the other one.
As a group leader, don't tell
those people who are un-cooperative
that you're having a meeting.
Maybe they'll just quit.
When you're with people who
believe in God, say you believe
in Him, even though you don't,
and when you're with people who
don't, make fun of people who do.
Lots of Integrity
Admit you're clueless and
go to the teacher for help.
Reach down and help her up.
Decide which one you really want
to go to and attend that one.
Then think it over and decide
if you really need to be in both.
Give the people who don't cooperate
at meetings a chance to tell you
why.
Be honest about how you feel
about God and then give
Him at least a chance.
You've probably already figured out that integrity is something God wants
us to have. Let's take a closer look at that.
How Is This a God Thing?
Time after time, Jesus told the Pharisees-who didn't have a clue when it
came to integrity-"You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of men,
but God knows your hearts" (Luke 16:15).
It's that stuff "behind the appearance" that makes up your integrity. It isn't
how smart you are in school-not at all. It's your attitude in class and your
drive to do your best, whatever it takes. It isn't how amazing you are at sports.
It's how you treat the other players and how you act when the game's over. It
isn't how many clubs and activities you're involved in. It's how committed you
are and how well you work with the other people who are in the activity with
you. It isn't how often you go to church. It's how often you really live the faith
you say you believe in.
So-you can be the best-even if you don't make straight As, win first-place
trophies, have a different activity going on every day after school, get
elected president of every club you join, or get the Sunday School attendance
award five years in a row. All it takes is having the integrity to do everything
completely and honestly.
In case that's still a little fuzzy around the edges for you, the Bible gives us
some good examples.
When Moses was getting burned out because so many people were coming
to him with their problems, his father-in-law Jethro advised him to select some
men who could handle the simpler problems on the local level. He told Moses
to choose men of integrity, and he spelled out integrity for him. He said that
people who have integrity are those who:
totally respect God.
can be trusted.
hate dishonest gain (cheaters, thieves, those kinds of folks). (See Exodus
18:21.)
Later, God added some additional pieces to the integrity puzzle. He said
people who have integrity:
don't twist things around to get their way.
don't accept bribes.
are always fair. (See Deuteronomy 16:19-20.)
Of course, those people back then weren't any quicker than we are, so years
later, Micah had to tell the people again what God expected in terms of
integrity. He said: "He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the Lord require of you?" (Micah
6:8). He said they should:
act justly.
love mercy.
walk humbly with their God.
Centuries later God was still trying to drive the
point home through his son Jesus and through his
servant John the Baptist. Both talked a lot about
integrity. They told the people that: the tax collectors should not take any more
money from people than they were supposed to (Luke 3:13).
the soldiers should not blackmail people or accuse them of things they
hadn't done (Luke 3:14).
everyone should treat other people the way they themselves would want
to be treated (Luke 6:31).
they should love their enemies and pray for them (Luke 6:32-36).
they should not pick on people, jump on their failures, or criticize their
faults, but be generous with their blessings (Luke 6:37-38).
Zacchaeus should be praised for his integrity, because he gave half his income
to the poor, and if he accidentally cheated anybody, he paid back four times the
damages (Luke 19:8).
Jesus took Nathanael on as a disciple because he could tell just by looking
at him that he didn't have a false bone in his body (John 1:47).
Finally, the idea of integrity began to stick in people's characters.
When Jesus died, a man named Joseph, who was even a member of the
Jewish High Council, took Jesus' instructions so much to heart that he went to
Pilate and asked for the body of Jesus. Then he prepared Jesus' body for burial
and placed it in the tomb he'd installed for himself. He took a huge risk, but he
did it because it was right to do (Luke 23:50-54).
When a man named Simon asked Peter to sell him the apostles' "secret" for
healing people, Peter not only refused, he read the guy the riot act for trying to
buy God's gift (Acts 8:18-23).
And of course Paul was all about integrity. When people started calling
Barnabas and him "gods," Paul stopped an entire parade and set them straight,
giving God all the credit for the miracles that he and Barnabas had done. (Acts
14:12-15). When he was outside of Israel, spreading the gospel, he took up a
collection for the poor and brought every cent of it back with him (Acts 24:16-17).
When times got hard for him and the rest of the early Christians, he didn't
throw up his hands and walk off the job, nor did he try to adjust the message to
make it easier so more people would join him. He just told the whole truth and
let people judge for themselves (2 Corinthians 4:2).
In fact, the basic quality we have to have if we're going to live Christian
lives is integrity. It's the only way, the God way, for you to be the best you at
everything you do.
CHECK
Yourself C
Before we talk about how you can get this secret ingredient, you need to
take a look at where you are right now on the integrity meter. This doesn't mean
you're going to find out just how rotten you really are inside! It's just a way for
you to figure out where you aren't whole so you can find the right pieces that
will make you complete.
Circle the letter of the sentence ending that sounds the most like what you
would do in each situation. Be as honest as you can.
1. If my teacher made a rule that if you
got caught chewing gum in class you
had to stick it on your nose and leave
it there for an hour, I would:
a. never chew gum.
b. be really careful not to get caught
when I'm chewing gum.
c. chew gum on purpose so I can refuse
to stick it on my nose.
d. complain to the teacher about the
rule after school.
2. If my teacher got really sarcastic with people when they messed up doing
math problems on the board, I would: a. work hard on my math so I won't mess up.
b. really hope she doesn't call on me.
c. be sarcastic right back if she pulls that on me.
d. ask a grown-up to talk to the teacher about the way she hurts kids'
feelings.
3. If we had a big, important test and I had studied all the wrong stuff, I
would:
a. tell the teacher I'm sick and can't take the test (which might actually
be true when you consider how upset I'd be!).
b. try to fake my way through it, because what else can I really do?
c. get mad at the teacher for not being more clear about what was going
to be on the test.
d. do the best I can and write a note on my paper telling the teacher what
happened.
4. If I were working on a group project for school and nobody was getting
the job done, I would:
a. do it all so I wouldn't get a bad grade.
b. do my part of the work and hope everybody else gets their act together.
c. refuse to do any work because I shouldn't have to if nobody else does.
d. do what I can and try to get the other people to do their parts.
5. If a class field trip was about to be canceled because somebody took the
teacher's tape player, and I knew who did it, I would:
a. get the tape player from where they were hiding it and put it back on
the teacher's desk when nobody is looking.
b. figure there is nothing I can do about it.
c. tell the teacher I don't think it is fair for everybody else to get punished
for something one person did.
d. go to the person who took it and tell her if she doesn't return it I'll have
to turn her in.
6. If I were playing in a soccer game and the referee said I fouled when I
didn't, I would:
a. be sure not get anywhere close to the sidelines for the
rest of the game.
b. shrug it off because, after all, it's only a game.
c. yell at the referee.
d. make sure the coach knows I didn't make the foul and
then let it pass because even referees make mistakes.
7. If I were a really good softball player on a team and a friend asked me to
go to a hot dog roast on the beach the night I had a practice, I would:
a. go to the practice, but resent it the whole time.
b. tell the coach I can't come to the practice because of family problems
and then go to the hot dog roast with my friend.
c. just not show up for practice. If I'm that good, the coach isn't going to
kick me off the team.
d. ask my friend if she'd invite me next time and then go to practice.
8. If a bunch of us in my neighborhood got together everyday after school
and practiced on my trampoline in the backyard, and we were getting
really good at stunts, I would:
a.
Continues.
