Chapter One
Discipline . Doesn't That
Mean You're Grounded?
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
Psalm 42:2
Before you toss this book into the nearest corner and hightail it in the other
direction because you just saw the word discipline-wait! It's not what
you think!
Discipline probably brings a lot of less-than-wonderful images to
mind-like being grounded when you skipped cleaning up your room after school to
catch one more rerun of Full House on TV. Or having your telephone
privileges taken away because your teacher sent home a note saying you weren't
getting your homework done.
Or you may be thinking about getting the talking-to of your life from your
parents because you got in trouble at school for passing notes to your best
friend (even though you tried to explain how important that note was!).
Your list may be a little different. It may even be longer! But the point is
that the word discipline probably has a bad meaning with girls your age.
It sure isn't something you go looking for, right?
Here's the good news: that isn't the kind of discipline we're talking about
here. (If you were looking for a book on how to avoid being disciplined
by your parents, try The Buddy Book and The It's MY Life Book!).
These disciplines-spiritual disciplines-are completely different. We're not
talking about punishment; we're talking about training-the kind you
opt for without anybody forcing you. It's the kind of training that you take on
because of all these things:
You want to be way close to God so you'll always know what to do.
You don't want to be forced into doing something just because the "popular
kids" are doing it.
You want to be joyful most of the time (even when things aren't going so
well).
You want to be who God wants you to be.
You want to be free to do what God wants you to do.
What does it look like to be that kind of person? Let's look at how each of
the Girlz is practicing a spiritual discipline each day.
Lily has quiet time with God every day in her special place, which
always includes prayer journaling and getting into the Bible for the stuff
that's going to help her today. She doesn't realize it yet, but that's why she
was able to control herself just yesterday. Ashley Adamson made one of her usual
sarcastic remarks about Lily being a "study geek," but Lily didn't say, "Well,
at least I'm not a study loser like you." She didn't even toss her head
and stomp off. Lily just smiled and said, "And I'm proud of it, Ashley"
and then walked away happy.
Reni has really de-cluttered her life, so she can now actually see
the floor in her bedroom and she has more time and space for God in her life.
Wednesday she would normally have gone to yet another violin lesson (she used to
take five lessons a week so she could be the best player in the county). She was
just about to dabble with her watercolors when the phone rang. It was Lily,
crying her eyes out and needing a friend big-time. Reni had time to ask her
over. And amazingly, there was a place for Lil to sit when she got there! Lily's
tears were gone within five minutes.
Suzy, who as you know is way shy, has started volunteering for some
service projects at church. First she served tables at the moms luncheon. When
that was pretty cool, she joined a group that was going to Potter's House to
hand out cookies to kids from homeless families. That actually turned out to be
fun, so Suzy decided to do her own cookie handout for everybody in
her class, at recess during January, when life can be pretty
dull after Christmas. She's noticing that she feels less
shy these days.
Zooey has recently started propping herself up
on her pillows at night before she goes to sleep
and talking to God
about all the stuff
she isn't proud of
from her day.
These are things
like talking back to
her mom, whispering
"I hate you" when her
brother was out of earshot,
and feeling jealous of Lily
because she got another role in a school play. She's learned to tell God all
about the yuckiness, accept where she is right now, and pray for the help to
move on with the determination to be better tomorrow. It's a funny thing. Zooey
no longer comes home at the end of the day and flops on the couch to flip
channels all evening. She can concentrate on getting her homework done. She can
even enjoy going to the movies with the Girlz more-all because she is no longer
constantly thinking, If only I didn't have such a big mouth or If
only I wasn't so hateful and If only I wasn't the laziest person on the
planet. Instead she's thinking, I'm sorry, God. Will you help me do
better next time?
Kresha goes to church to worship every Sunday now. She sings louder,
she laughs right out loud when the pastor makes a joke in the sermon, and she
cries when a prayer seems to be just for her. But that isn't all. She has also
started doing some worshiping on her own. She takes a long bath every Saturday
night (in spite of her little brothers banging on the door) and prays that God
will wash away her sins so she'll be ready to receive all the spiritual stuff
that'll be coming to her in church the next day. She wears a cross every day,
and as she puts it on, she prays for more and more faith. And when she realized
God had helped her stop yelling at her little brothers (when they banged on the
bathroom door), she threw a pizza party for herself and the Girlz-and God.
The Girlz say the results of these spiritual disciplines are awesome.
HOW IS THIS A God Thing?
On the night of the Last Supper, when Jesus was telling his disciples
what was about to happen and why, he prayed for them. One of the
things he said to his Father was, "I have brought you glory on earth
by completing the work you gave me to do" (John 17:4).
And what God assigned him to do was pretty big. He had to
show people exactly what God was like and then return to God
by being crucified, dying, rising again, and then being
lifted back up to heaven. Aren't you glad we don't
have that assignment? How did Jesus do it?
The obvious answer is that it was easier for him
because he was the Son of God-but it isn't that
simple. He had to come to earth in human form and
suffer through everything we have to suffer through
in life. Since it was his job to show us how to get our own missions from God
accomplished (and we all have them), he couldn't just snap his God fingers and
make it happen. He had to demonstrate for us.
So what did he do to make it possible for him to really know God, hear him,
and obey him? How did he resist the temptation to say, "Oh, forget it. I'm just
going to perform a miracle and get it over with!"
Jesus practiced the same spiritual disciplines we're going to talk about in
this book.
Quiet Time
In spite of how busy he was (he was always being followed around by crowds
of people clamoring to have their sicknesses healed and asking endless
questions), Jesus took a lot of time to be alone with God. He started off his
whole ministry by spending forty days by himself in the desert (now that's a lot of alone time!), and after that he was constantly going off
by himself to pray. He spent a whole night in prayer before he picked his
disciples (Luke 6:12), and he went off in a boat by himself when he got the news
that John the Baptist had been killed. He wasn't just trying to get away from
people (whining little brothers, nagging moms, friends he was sick of). He just
wanted to hear God better. We know that while he was alone, he prayed
and listened and devoted himself to his Father, because
every time he came out of solitude,
he went right back to
doing what God had sent him
to do-healing, teaching, and
forgiving people.
Simplicity
Jesus didn't clutter up
his life with a lot of stuff that
would distract him from his
ministry, and he advised his
disciples to follow his example. When he sent them out to spread the good news
that the Son of God had arrived to teach people how to change their lives, he
advised them to keep it simple. He told them not to load themselves down with
equipment and stuff. He urged them not to stay in fancy hotels but rather to be
content with someplace modest. He told them to just leave quietly if people
didn't like them and didn't want to listen to their message (Luke 9:3-5). The
disciples did what he said-following the example he was living for
them-and they got great results! They spread the news and healed people
everywhere they went, which was exactly what God wanted them to do.
Service
Although Jesus was the Son of
God, he was constantly serving other
people. He didn't mind getting his
hands dirty to heal them (John 9:6). He
went to his friends Mary and Martha and raised
their brother, Lazarus, from the dead (John 11:38-44). And
just so his disciples wouldn't think they could only serve by doing big, flashy
things, he washed the gross, caked-on dirt from their feet (John 13:3-11). We're
talking towel, apron, and the whole thing. When the disciples saw him do this,
they realized that the way the world decides who is great and who isn't is a
bunch of hogwash. They learned that all of us are equal in God's eyes and need
to behave that way.
Confession
Jesus stayed true to his assignment throughout his ministry. He never
doubted that he was doing the right thing or that he was doing it the right way.
(Wouldn't that be a nice feeling?) But the night he was about to go to
his death, he got pretty depressed. One of his dearest friends was about to turn
him over to the authorities. He was about to be nailed to a cross. Even though
he was the Son of God, he began to wonder if there could be another way to do
what God wanted. Of course he knew there wasn't, but instead of hiding his doubt
from God, he went straight to his Father with his feelings. "Father,"
he said, "if you are willing, take this cup from me" (Luke
22:42). And what happened? God immediately took
over and Jesus knew what was right. "Yet," he said right
away, "not my will, but yours be done." Jesus' confession
to God gave him the determination to go ahead with
his assignment to die for us so we could give him all our
sin and be forgiven and blessed.
Worship
Jesus went to the temple to worship every Sabbath. And he didn't just sit
back and listen to the readings and the sermon. He participated in the worship.
Half the time he took over! Remember when he spent the whole day teaching
in the meeting place and blew everybody away with the way he taught the
Scriptures (Mark 1:21-22)? And when he gave a lecture in the meeting place in
his hometown (Mark 4:16-22)? Oh, and how about when he read the scroll of
the prophet Isaiah and revealed that he was about to fulfill that prophecy (Luke
4:17-21)? Jesus knew how important it was for people to get together and
encourage each other in their journeys with God. People began to know they
could trust him, because he "belonged" with them. He was one of them.
Obviously, if Jesus practiced those disciplines-spending quiet time
alone with God, living a simple life, serving other people, confessing to God,
worshiping God-we're supposed to practice them, too.
But it isn't just a matter of doing it because we're supposed to. This isn't
another bunch of things to add to your schedule and if you do them you'll go to
heaven. We, like Jesus, need to do these things to get the same benefits Jesus
did.
We'll get to experience being Christians instead of just going to church
and saying our prayers.
We'll be changed into more complete, happier people.
We'll be free from other people's opinions that weigh us down.
We'll be close to God.
We'll know what it is God wants us to do in our lives.
We can't get any of that good stuff just by trying. God gives us all that
through a thing called grace, just because he loves us. But we have to
show God we really want to be right in his eyes to get that grace, and we get it
through the spiritual disciplines.
[CHECK] Yourself OUT
It could be that you're practicing some of the spiritual disciplines already
and don't even know it! (That would be cool, wouldn't it?) Let's find out where
you are right now and where you need to be-which is always a good way to
start any journey.
In each set of statements, put a star next to the one that best fits you. If
none of the statements fit you, put a star next to the one that says, "None of
these statements sound like me." Be totally honest because there are no right or
wrong, good or bad answers. You're looking for what's true for you right now.
Quiet Time
____1. I have a special place where I like to go sometimes by myself, just to
do nothing.
____2. I sometimes go off by myself to pray.
____3. I spend time alone every day, praying and writing in a journal and
listening to God.
____4. None of these statements sounds like me.
Simplicity
____1. Sometimes I think I have too much stuff or too much to do or both.
____2. Every once in a while I give some of my stuff away.
____3. I try to make space in my life for God by not
getting a whole bunch of stuff and totally filling
up my schedule.
____4. None of these statements sound like me.
Service
____1. If I have to do something nice for somebody
else, I usually feel good afterward.
____2. If I get a chance to do something nice for somebody
or help someone out, I usually do it.
____3. I look for ways to be nice to people and help
them out.
____4. None of these statements sound like me.
Confession
____1. If I do something wrong, I sometimes wish I had somebody I
could talk to about it.
____2. If I do something wrong, I usually go to somebody who can help
me 'fess up to it and apologize or make it right.
____3. If I do something wrong, I go to God and talk it over with him
so I'll know what to do.
____4. None of these statements sound like me.
Worship
____1. I go to church almost every Sunday.
____2. I really like to go to church and sing and pray and participate in
everything.
____3. I love to go to church and really get into it, and I also like to do
things on my own to praise God.
____4. None of these statements sound like me.
So what do your answers mean? Keep in mind that we're not telling you that
you're the best-or the worst!-spiritually disciplined person in all
Christianity. This is just a way for you to find out how much discipline you
already have so God can work with you to give you all those spiritual goodies
we've been talking about!
If most of your answers were number 1s, that means you have the right idea
about spiritual discipline already. Look especially at the sets where you put a
star next to number 1, so you can say to yourself, "Wow, I've already got it
going on in that area." Once you learn more about each of those disciplines,
you'll fall naturally into them. It'll almost be a piece of cake!
If most of your answers were number 2s, it tells you that you're already
partly practicing those disciplines. Look especially closely at the sets where
you put a star next to number 2, because those are the areas where you have a
good start. Once you learn more about each of the disciplines, you'll see how
you can become even closer to God.
If most of your answers were number 3s, you're there, at least in the sets
where you put a star next to number 3. Look closely at the ones where you
didn't, because those are the ones you'll want to work on. Our hope for you
is that eventually you'll be practicing all the disciplines.
That's going to be really cool for you and God.
If most of your answers were number 4s, you've
probably had a lot of stuff competing for your attention.
Now that you have a chance to learn more about spiritual
disciplines and how to practice them, you'll be able to focus
more and more of your attention on God-and that's a good thing. Of course
you'll want to read this whole book and do the activities, but really get into
the chapters about the disciplines where you had number 4 stars. Don't try to
weave all the spiritual disciplines into your life at once. Take one at a time
and don't move on to the next until you feel that discipline is such a part of
your everyday activities that you wouldn't know what to do without it.
(Continues.)
